Ongoing Religious Trauma of LGBTQIA2S+ People of Faith

 In my work with the OR-ID United Methodist Church Conference, along with my friendship and participation with many local organizations of LGBTQIA2S+ people, I often find a mixed reaction to when people find out I am an out Presbyterian pastor. While there are those who express a history of being raised in a church, there is a strong indication that being part of and self-identifying as part of the LGBTQIA2S+ community caused a certain trauma in the lives of those people who are out. Some would even call the period of their post-lives of having left the church as a PTSD period--post traumatic stress disorder. Trauma at the hands of a religious community. Having been denied tenure at one religious institution of higher education, and denied a few called-installed positions in a church in the Presbyterian Church (USA), I can relate to having experienced or still experiencing some trauma of being refused for tenure or a called-installed position, simply because I’m gay, and the person I loved.

In a report from NBC News, “Religious Trauma Still Haunts Millions of LGBTQ Americans,” the very title hit the nail on the head. We, who self-identify as LGBTQIA2S+ people of faith, and have lived our lives in and around a religious community, may have suffered some degree of trauma at the hands of religious leaders and congregations. 

In an article by Spencer Macnaughton, he writes: 

"Kellen Swift-Godzisz, 35, said he doesn’t go on dates, struggles with erectile dysfunction and is hesitant to trust people. For more than 20 years, he’s experienced intense bouts of anxiety and depression that have had a 'major hold on his life.’

Imagine being told by everyone you trusted that you’re going to hell because you like men,” Swift-Godzisz, a marketing project manager living in Chicago, told NBC News.

At just 11 years old, Swift-Godzisz recalled, he would sit in his bedroom every night praying or writing letters that said, Please God, remove my affliction of same-sex attraction,' and would then store each letter in an overflowing shoebox in his closet.”

I, along with millions of others, prayed such a prayer, that God would make me straight and take away my same-sex attraction to other boys, and later, men. I would bargain with God. Plead. Beg. Cry. 

Swife-Godzisz is 1 out of 3 adults who have suffered religious trauma in their lives. 1 in 5 currently experience major religious trauma. 

Macnaughton continues: 

“'In its worst manifestations, it’s basically a mind rape,' said Marlene Winell, a psychologist who coined the term “religious trauma syndrome” in 2011. 'These doctrines that are taught to you over and over are so damaging and so hideous and so hard to weed out. In many cases, you have been violated, you have been abused or you have been shamed, and the impact is very deep and can be everlasting.’” 

Of course, conversion therapy comes into play. As do national groups like “Focus in the Family” and the Family Research Council and Tony Perkins. These are therapies and national movements that become part and parcel of families and congregations, that traumatize LGBTQIA2S+ people without apology, and with a certain religious zeal. 

Said Jamie Long, who self-identifies as a lesbian: "Religion has obliterated my life.”

Can’t get more powerful than that.

The cure or a way to go forward? Two possibilities. First, simply cut out that which causes the trauma. The second? Find an affirming community of faith, which is what we are trying to do at La Mesa Presbyterian Church. 

Here’s a link to the article: https://www.nbcnews.com/nbc-out/out-health-and-wellness/millions-lgbtq-americans-religious-trauma-psychiatrists-want-help-rcna135728. 

There’s work to do out in the world to bring about healing after centuries of abuse and religious trauma. Religious trauma should be an oxymoron. No one should suffer abuse and trauma in any religious community, especially a church.

No one.

It is a sin.

May it be so.